New Vandalism Roundup

No.


No You're Not.


That makes two of us.

Just saying you're sorry does not make it okay.

School of Art Policy Regarding Unplanned Performances

Alternate Title (A): "Who's In Charge of this Ephemeral Self Expression?"
Alternate Title (B): "Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About How To Hang Out With Your Friends On Campus Without Having It Go Horribly Wrong"
Alternate Title (C): "Who's The Man Now Dogs?"
Alternate Title (D): What's Okay and Not Okay and The Good People Who Will Remind You If You Forget


The Art School was recently asked what its policy was regarding Musical (or Otherwise Amplified) Performances that happen on campus, outside of the gallery context. The short answer was "We don't have one", the long answer was "We support everything, but maybe we should make one of those policy things..."

And we came up with some new ideas, some of which I think are really excited but which aren't really hammered out yet so I won't get into.

FOR NOW I'd like to address the Art School's policy regarding unplanned, spontaneous musical performances. I wrote this. Ahem...

The School of Art permits School of Art students to hold informal musical, sound, or art performances in School of Art areas, as long as those events do not violate pre-existing CalArts and School of Art policy (including health and safety standards).

Pretty straightforward right?
But the devil is in the details.

What exactly is "pre-existing CalArts and School of Art policy (including health and safety standards)"? you might ask. Well, there's a lot of policies and health and safety standards, but in general it's like this----you can do whatever you want as long as you don't (A) endanger yourself or others, and (B) don't make too much noise and (C) aren't drinking alcohol.

Let's go over those one at a time...
(A) Endangering yourself or others....
If your unplanned art performance idea is to crawl along the exterior of the building wearing a suit covered in broken glass, you are endangering yourself (you could fall off the building, you could cut yourself) and others (you could fall off the building onto someone else and break their legs, then cut them with your broken glass suit in the ensuing struggle). CalArts will use any means at its disposal to stop this unplanned performance as it is happening, even if it is the best art you can make, because it's very dangerous.

(B) Don't Make Too Much Noise

All your best friends think you are sick on the axe. They love to hear you wail. You have impressed them so much, they tell you it is your one redeeming quality. The reason why they put up with your terrible personality. You don't know what those jerks are talking about but you like the part where they say you are good at guitar. You want the whole world to hear your guitar. You sit out on the C-Dock at 11pm and start playing this Randy-Rhoads-meets-Hot-Rats-era-Zappa thing you've been working on. It's not THAT loud, you're only using a practice amp. Meanwhile, someone trying to get some sleep in Ahmanson Hall is going out of their minds and calls Campus Safety to complain about open-ended quasi-metal noodling without benefit of a rhythm section, and the Campus Safety guy at the desk relays that into his walky-talky and the Campus Safety Officer near the C-Dock is like "I just walked right by that guy, he was playing something sounded like a 'Crazy Train' and 'Willie The Pimp' mashup, I'll ask him to stop or use headphones or something."

And guess what? He's allowed to ask you to stop, and you're supposed to stop. Why? Because you are Bothering People. And they complained.

You might be tempted to bark something like "Do you have any idea how much I pay to go to this school!!??" at this guy, but I wouldn't because he probably does, or maybe he doesn't, nobody cares, but whatever it is, it's pretty much what the four people who called to complain about you paid, so don't get bent out of shape, pal. It's okay. Take the high road. Lower the volume, or better yet, plug some headphones in that practice amp and just chill out. Then you can add "patience" and "empathy" and maybe a dash of "maturity" to your list of redeeming characteristics. I'm proud of you!

(C) Don't Be Drinking Alcohol
If you're doing any of the above and are drinking you've got no claim to any high road. I get it. Everyone gets it. Drinking is fun. But you're not supposed to do it on campus unless you're getting it from a can or a plastic cup from a Student Affairs bartender. If you're not, you got no case! So don't get all bent out of shape. Just forfeit right there.

And even though drinking can be fun, you don't HAVE to drink to have a good time, right guys?



The only people who are allowed to drink on campus are graduate MFA's within the confines of their Annex, Broad, A403 and Butler Building studio areas. And that was only permitted with the expectation that their gatherings would look like this...



Not This



OKAY, so that's that.

NOW, all the examples I made above are kind of assuming that these unplanned events are happening on a regular day when nothing much else is going on. As we all know, most people on campus all want to strut their stuff at the same time: Thursday Night.

The reason the School of Art was asked to come up with a policy regarding performances & events is because we had a number of such things going on and they caused some unfortunate confrontations and hubbub. THEN we started to get requests for the art school to officially sanction the use of specific areas for music performances ON THURSDAY NIGHT. The school of art does not want to discourage anyone from expressing themselves in any way they please. Honestly, nobody on campus wants to do thatt. But doing things on Thursday night, through official channels or spontaneously, is ALWAYS problematic because there are usually SEVEN OTHER ART EVENTS that night---namely ALL THE ART OPENINGS. So if there are seven art openings, with 4-to-7 bartenders there, then the obligatory "unofficial" (and often not staid-wine-and-cheese-affair-style) after-party in the Broad/Annex area, and THEN a punk rock show at the dock, PLUS whatever naked gamelanning and whatever other stuff happens to be going on that night, all happening within about six hours' time, all having to be monitored by like four over-burdoned campus safety officers, the campus safety officers' nerves will be a wreck, the safety and general well-being of everyone involved in all this can't really be monitored in any kind of effective way, there will inevitably be confrontations and bad things happening, and everything negative that happens that night will be perceived as the art school's fault. So I'm really in a position of having to strongly discourage any more THINGS happening on Thursday nights.

Phew.

And so if you want to have a PLANNED performance, where someone from the Art Office signs off on your location and time, I'm going to Generally Discourage planning that stuff for Thursday Nights. There are all the reasons listed above, and there are often a lot of other events on campus on that night too, and it's really hard for the Institute Coordinators to juggle all the needs of all these different people on this one night. Again, it's also very difficult for Campus Safety to monitor all these different concurrent events.

IN CONCLUSION:
Unplanned, spontaneous performances are fine, as long as no one complains and you're not doing anything illegal. If you're causing noise complaints or your gettin' dangerous then you're going to be asked to stop and you should stop.

You can plan your performance ahead of time and the art school will likely support the event, BUT if you're planning on doing it on Thursday night, you may not get clearance from me if there are too many other events going on that night.

Does that make sense? I hope so.

COMING SOON...
My exciting post that is devoted ENTIRELY to explaining Campus Safety and its Procedures to you! I've already started working on it. It's epic.

Rain + Art = Sad Face

Storm, J.M.W. Turner

(The following is primarily of concern to those with "outdoor studios" like the Broads, Annex studios, and Butler Building studios. Still, it could be useful to anyone I guess...)


So it's winter in Southern California, which means it will actually be raining every once in awhile over the next couple months. Due to the "unique" design of many of our buildings, some of your studios are "uniquely" prone to leaks and water seepage. To help avoid mayhem and damage to art work, please make sure your windows remain closed and you don't store any valuable artworks or equipment or possessions under window sills or on the floor near doors.

Also, check out your ceiling: is there bubbled up paint up there? A big crack in the ceiling of some kind? Water stains? You'll want to avoid putting something of any worth to you underneath that spot. Heck, you might even want to cover your stuff with plastic just to be extra safe.

Do I realize that I just told you not to store your art near windows, on floors, near doors, or UNDER the CEILING? Yes, I do. But I'm telling you anyway.

If you've got water leaking in your studio, let me know ASAP and I'll try and get someone out there to address it. If your windows are stuck open, let me know and I'll try to get someone to fix them.

Water damage is the cross we who inhabit experimental architecture have to bear!



Godspeed.

The Fire Marshall Cometh

Don't even think about it.


Hey There All Students in the School of Art

The Fire Marshall is inspecting CalArts this week. Some of you may
have received a visit from him.

I ran into him in the hallway today and he told me the biggest problem
in the studios is that there is too much stuffed furniture, too many
toxic/flammable chemicals, and a great deal of overloading/misuse of
extension cords. I have a number of notices already for "General
Housekeeping"---essentially "Too much stuff in the studio". I will be
trying to assess how to deal with this in the coming weeks.

If the fire marshall singles out your studio for an infraction, you
will receive notice from me and one week to address the issue. If the
issue is not resolved in one week's time, I will have to personally
take steps to resolve the issue in order to comply with the fire
marshall's demands.

As of my writing this, the fire marshall is still making the rounds of
the studios. You can probably make things a little easier on all of
us by taking a look at your own studio space, tidying it up, and
making sure that you unplug all extension cords before leaving your
studio, are not overloading your electric sockets, and are storing
chemicals like resings, turpentine, etc. in the Flammable Liquids
cabinets provided. Some studio areas (such as the Annex and Broad
studios) do not have Flammable Liquids cabinets, but if you contact me
I can help provide you with appropriate storage.

...And just so you guys know, to actually comply with what the fire marshall is requesting will actually require us to CHANGE our BEHAVIOR in some significant and RECOGNIZABLE WAY.

MFA-2's, take a page from Rollins.

DO IT.

CHANGE IN STUDIO REQUEST POLICY FAQ

Why the change in policy?

The art program's studio situation changed without warning over the summer. The Studio Czar is returning to his throne to find his kingdom in flux. At the moment, as I'm writing this, we've lost a couple of the studios we had last year. It's not a catastrophe, but it limits our options as to where we can put people and what we can provide. But hopefully only FOR THE MOMENT as a number of new studios are actually being built to make up for it. But the only problem with that is we have to, you know, wait for them to get built. The reason the policy is different this semester is that, in all honesty, I will not even know how many studios are at our disposal this semester, nor how many students will need them, for a number of weeks, and a number of decisions will have to be made based purely on the logistics.


I'm an incoming MFA. Is this something I should be concerned about?

No, this doesn't apply to you. These changes mostly effect returning BFA students.


But Studio Czar, I talked to you over the summer and you said to come bug you during registration and now registration's about to start and you're saying don't bug you! You're sending me mixed signals!!

Well, I sent you two distinct signals. The first was "Come on over, it's fine" and the second was "Actually it's crazy. Please don't come over here. I'll call you, I promise, just give me some time". Or that was the signal I meant to send. It's admittedly a pretty complicated signal.

I'm a BFA-4 and I thought this would be the year I got the gigantic studio with the huge window and my buddy who just moved out said he'd bequeath me his coffee maker and even though you didn't know that, I think that means his old studio is my new studio, right?

Wrong. All bets are off, my friend. Larger studios will probably be used for people to share, and the mid-size and smaller studios will be reserved for individuals to use. The theme this year is "Don't Worry Be Happy (That You Have A Studio)"

Studio Czar, I'm a BFA-3 in the Art Program and I'm supposed to get my own studio, right? So where is it?

Well, my friend, I'm trying to find it. So please sit tight and I'll call you if something turns up.

Studio Czar, I'm a BFA-1 but I'm incredibly mature and I make enormous things, can I have my own studio?

No.

But, as a BFA-1 in the Art Program, will I get a studio at all?

Yes, all BFA-1's in the Art Program will be getting studios to share. BFA-1's in the Photo/Media will not receive studios, but they will have access to the Photo Lab and storage in that area.

Studio Czar, I hear what you're saying, but I know a guy who just got a new studio and I'm jealous of him and angry at you. I believe you are playing favorites and I think this is all a conspiracy against me and I hate you.

Well, I hope you will reconsider your hatred. But anyway, yes, some people have already changed studios, and people will continue to change studios, and I WILL try to take everyone's needs into account and accommodate their practice to provide them with a positive work environment. But it will take time and cooperation.


Studio Czar, let's just say I actually believe what you just said--Riddle me this! I don't get along with people in my studio block. It's actually REALLY BAD, man. With this new policy, Are you saying I can't come talk to you about that?

You can, and should, absolutely come to me with any studio problems. If you can't get along with people in your block, or are having problems with your studio mate, it's good for me to know so I can help fix the problem. Sometimes that involves changing studios, and sometimes it just involves improving communication. Please feel free to come to me with these issues.

What about leaks, spiders, and other maintenance problems in my studio? Can I come talk to you about that?

Absolutely. That's what I'm here for. That, and all the other stuff I was just talking about. The best thing to do would be to contact me by email or to come to my office during the posted times where I'm available to everyone, and then I can make arrangements.

One more thing, Studio Czar. I don't really feel like walking over to your office from 12-1 on Monday, Tuesday or Thursday, reading your emails, reading your blog, reading your fliers, or emailing you directly. Would it be cool if I just cornered you in the hall while you're obviously busy doing something else?

Not really.

God, you're so cranky!

That wasn't a question.

CHANGE IN STUDIO REQUEST POLICY

Hi Everyone.
Last week I sent out this email to all the students. It has caused shockwaves of confusion, panic, and fear (well, I got a few emails and stuff). Actually, I edited this thing since I sent out the email. Maybe the email I sent out was a tiny bit less air-tight than this version, but the basic idea is the same. Anyway, this is the thing on my door right now....

PLEASE READ THIS

I will be unable to consider specific studio requests for the Fall Semester.

If you already have a studio that you have rented over the summer, continue to use that studio until further notice.

Incoming MFA’s, transfer students and returning students without studios will be contacted about their new studios in the first 2 weeks of classes.

Incoming BFA-1’s will receive information on studios in Foundations class.

All returning students will be contacted directly about studio changes.

Please Do Not send me studio requests via email or leave studio requests on my door. I will not be able to consider them.

My Office, A211K, will be open at the following times during the Fall Semester:

MON 12pm – 1pm

TUE 12pm – 1pm

Thursday 12pm – 1pm

I will not be available for individual consultation at any other time during the week.

Please check the bulletin board next to my office door (A211K) for studio information. This information will be updated regularly.

Your patience and cooperation is appreciated.

John Hogan

Studio/Gallery Manager

Office A211K

jhogan@calarts.edu

(661) 222-2795

Okay, don't panic. Do not fear. I'm not being replaced with a robot. I know you are worried about that. I will FAQ this thing in the next blog post.